The Case for Common Sense

If you want to protect your family from the slim chance of a home invasion, you have this right as an American. Get a glock with a magazine that holds 20-30 rounds, a security system, and a pit bull. If you need more than this, you are either way too paranoid or you’re a fucking pussy. First of all, ‘Scarface’ was just a movie. And in case you watched that movie, the arsenal of weapons Al Pacino had didn’t do him much good. Get over this whole bullshit Second Amendment right to bear machine guns and rocket launchers. Learn how to shoot a reasonable gun, or go fuck yourself.

I know the classic NRA comeback, so I will knock it down right now: “Guns don’t kill people, people kill people.” Okay, excellent point. Here is my response: “People who are firing a weapon with high-capacity magazines that shoot 100 rounds per minute will kill a lot more fucking people than those with 20-30 rounds.” So the question comes down to how many dead children do we want to bury? I personally would rather see less dead kids when some psychopath decides to go buck wild. I will agree that we cannot prevent the violent behavior of every individual. But we can indeed take steps to prevent the casualties that result from such behavior.


Another NRA classic: “More guns prevent gun violence, so we should keep an armed guard at all schools.” Rebuttal: “If I’m a raging psychopath who wants to kill people, the first person I’ll shoot is the guy with the gun. Crazy people are not stupid.” And besides this point, who is paying for the armed guard? The State? Are we gonna get rid of the history department or girls athletics to pay for this guy to stand out in front of school all day? I know the Feds aren’t paying for it as long as there is a GOP-controlled House of Representatives. Stupid fucking idea unless you disguise the guy as an administrator somehow, and even so, who pays for it?

The NRA blames video games and movies for a violent culture in America that is ultimately responsible for such shootings. This may be the dumbest shit I ever heard. Yeah we should just slash the 1st Amendment in favor of the second. Even for an NRA douchebag, this is pretty fucking ridiculous. And the other idea gaining popularity is to arm all teachers. Wow. I’m thinking the people who came up with this one have never been to an actual city. Maybe this will work in West Texas, but the sixth graders at schools in Chicago will take that fucking gun from little Ms. Johnson before she is done giving her syllabus. This dude may not shoot up the school, but he’ll shoot someone with that fucking gun. Now you got state-issued firearms being used to commit murders all over American cities. Fabulous idea.

Bottom line is this: There is no need for assault weapons or high-capacity magazines unless you want to kill a shitload of people in a very small amount of time. If you are not currently in the military, than this should not apply to you. Hell, most military operations don’t even require that type of firepower anymore. If you are a gun nut conspiracy theorist, trust me, the government is not gonna snatch all your firearms and prevent you from forming a 1790-style militia. And I got news for you, if they wanted to do so, they could do it easily no matter how much firepower you have. They could drop a fucking missile on your house from 5,000 miles away. Therefore, even if your dumbass conspiracy were to come true, you are still fucked. So let’s just agree to ban assault rifles and limit some senseless casualties. This should not be a partisan issue. It’s a fucking issue of humanity.

– Kevin

The Fiscal Slope

the-fiscal-slope (BF pic)Everybody get your guns, hide in the basement, and pray to your respective gods. The so-called fiscal cliff is looming. Or you could just go about your daily business and shut the fuck up, because there is no fiscal cliff. I don’t know who coins these little catch phrases, but the media eats them up like candy. This sequestration deal that both Republicans and the White House agreed upon pertains to tax increases and spending cuts that will occur over the next ten years. I’m sorry but ten years does not constitute a cliff. It is more like a weak slope that you couldn’t even sled down. And this issue certainly can be resolved at some point over the next decade.

NWR hopes there is no deal. If not, it will mark the end of the Republican Party. They seem to forget they just got their asses kicked in the last election. Boehner talks like he’s holding a straight flush and he’s gonna call the President’s bluff. Why the hell would Obama give an inch? He just kicked your ass in the election. Do you really think the American people, particularly the middle-class & poor, will blame Obama for tax increases that would result from this sequestration? No. They will blame the douchebag, redneck Republican-controlled House of Representatives, or as I like to call them – The House of Cunts. There aren’t enough rich old white men left in this country to keep the Republican Party afloat. Dig your own grave Boehner, and then cry like a little bitch.

All you have to do is agree to raise taxes on 2% of the population, and the White House will probably cut a deal. I don’t care what your bullshit reasoning is against such a measure – job creators, wealth destruction, punishing success, etc. The people just voted, and they aren’t buying that shit. Wealthy individuals and corporations are hoarding cash, not creating jobs. You don’t believe me? Look at any large-cap company’s balance sheet. They only seem to spend money on Republican campaigns, and that ship has sailed. So why the fuck would they start hiring people? I said it before and I’ll say it again: Supply-side economics is nothing but propaganda. This is an indisputable fact, and apparently the American people agree. Otherwise, they would have voted for the rich douchebag instead of the black guy.

So take a stand Boehner, and stick to your dumbass principles. Rally all the assholes in your caucus to support the cause. And when you sink the middle-class, you will have effectively destroyed the future of your whole bullshit conservative movement. I wish you all the luck in the world. Go fuck yourself – literally.

– Kevin